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USER REPRESENTATION - A SATIRICAL GLIMPSE by Chris Barchard

CHAIR: Now we come on to user representation on our committees.

FLORENCE: Yes, we've had another three working groups looking into this during the past year.

USER (putting his hand up): When are we actually going to get more user representation on this group? I have been the only one for the past three years and all that time you've been talking about having another person. The Department of Health is concerned about this. What is being done?

FLORENCE: Well, we haven't been dragging our feet. We've had seventeen working groups looking into this and another five lined up. We do want to get the right person you know. I mean it's important not to get any old user on this committee. We want one that shares our views and won't rock the boat.

USER: I begin to see why it's taking so long.

CHAIR: Perhaps we'd better move on to the next item, user speeches at our functions.

GERTRUDE: Yes, these patients really are getting too much time at our functions. After, all, dignitaries and professionals understand their views better than they do. I mean, really, it's not on is it?

USER: Just a minute.

CHAIR: Hang on. Nellie, you had your hand up first.

NELLIE: Yes, that's exactly fight. We do understand users' needs and views and other people are much better at expressing them objectively than they are.

IT REALLY IS FUN BEING A USER ON A COMMITTEE.